Remembering Valleys

Well, I don’t share my inmost thoughts with people very often. I’ve just noticed that everyone has their own different filters for how they perceive what’s being said, and too many people are way too eager to be offended. Also, I’m a Yankee who tends to speak in hyperbole and way too far outside the box so it isn’t difficult to send literal interpreters over the edge in a state of theological distress.

I’m looking forward to a little blog because I have been having a difficult time lately. I guess I’m more aggravated by that than anything. I am the ultimate fan of the ‘Walk it Off’ School of Counseling and here I am being dragged down by things that just seem much less significant than I have made them. It boggles my logical mind that my heart can be so idiotic at times. The reasons are irrelevant, but one thing I have noticed here in the valley is how eager I am to forget all about it when I am on the mountaintop. I am amazed at how arrogant I have been up there, looking down at all those poor souls who suffer. If only their faith was stronger, or their Bible reading better, or their prayer life more diligent! If only they would repent and turn away from whatever heinous sin they must be hiding to be in such a place. I’m not sure what sin that might have been, but I could speculate! And if I shared my concerns with my Godly brothers & sisters I’m sure we could compare notes and come up with a definite diagnosis of their failures. A tragic diagnosis, for sure, and one that is presumably contagious so when I saw them in their suffering, I must have soberly turned away, lest the image of them corrupts the mental peace and order I have on my beautiful mountaintop cathedral. Thank God, I’m not like them!

I thought I was completely clothed and highly regarded, but how naked was I in God’s eyes? A pastor once said that Christians are the only group of people who shoot their wounded. I’m afraid that is true. Not really out of malice, maybe just out of pity? Or maybe because their presence dirties the image we want to maintain. Why does our faith seem to anesthetize us toward the suffering of others and make us incapable of relating to the wounded? Shouldn’t it do the opposite? We almost look at their suffering in disbelief, as if it were so long ago, maybe even in a dream, that we were in there shoes. How do we forget the struggles of life so easily? Are we so ‘buzzed’ in our religious ideals that we can no longer feel or even acknowledge suffering in others. We meet each opportunity to serve with an apathetic demeanor and some vague statement suggesting that God will do whatever needs to be done without our passion for His purposes or His people. Those looking on see our spacey, euphoric smile and wonder if anyone’s home. I am wondering how I have misunderstood the teachings of the Holy Spirit in such a way that in my pursuit of Him that I have developed such an ungodly characteristic. Well, I repent. Just know that when your day in the valley is here, I will be someone safe that you can come to when everyone else turns away.